Out there in TV land there are several shows who label themselves as reality TV or at least claim to be based on what real life is like on the home front for wives. Uh – yeah right. Whatever. Why make stuff up when the reality is insane enough? The “desperate” in the TV show’s title, that many seem to love, has nothing to do with sex on MY side of the front door.
Let’s do a step back to a day that still feels like yesterday…
Laura called to say hi on a day I had nearly had it up to my eyeballs in poopy diapers, milk curdled sippy cups found stashed in the toy box, lost keys retrieved from the bottom of the diaper pail my 3 year old had “helped” clean up, the newly emptied bookshelf with accompanying sidewalk of book trails leading out of the girls room and down the hall (created while I was nursing their brother)… just for starters. I was a walking zombi from the previous night I had spent nearly every waking hour of rotating my infant son from freezer to steaming bathroom because of the Croup he had. (YES, i did say freezer. In case you aren’t aware, the cold of a freezer can help shrink the bronchial inflammation as will steam i am guessing, since this is what the doctor said i do. And NO I did not put HIM in the freezer, just his head. Perfectly legal I assure you.)
Instead of being sorry she asked, Laura started laughing. God love her, she started laughing and told me she loved me. She said I needed to write all this down because NO ONE would believe me otherwise. She asked what I was doing that very minute. She wanted a mental picture of me. I said, “Well, I’m holding Drake over my shoulder, head in the freezer while I write a shopping list of of desperately needed items and talking to YOU. I am still in my pajamas and bathrobe at 3 in the afternoon and the girls are half naked because Drake started screaming when they were still in the bathtub.” How’s that for your REAL Desperate Housewife? But no one wants to make a REAL “reality” TV show. They want people to tune in, not run screaming from the room and refuse to give birth to children. This is the stuff we should be putting our teens in front of when they want to go have sex at 15 because they are so “in love”. A good dose of reality would be a healthy thing.
“Housewife” gets a bad rap sometimes out in the real world. It most certainly does not mean “stay at home and not work all day”, as the TV would have you believe. And it doesnt mean the wife is lazy and refuses to work a “real job”. I am guessing that I am not alone in my daily schedule, which usually means I work from the moment my kids get out of bed at 5:45 a.m. till way after they are in bed, often till 10 or 11 at night. I needed to catch up on laundry so yesterday, for instance, so I folded and put away clothes into darkened rooms till midnight. I had no other time to get it done, and wanted a weekend without a day of laundry in it. I was “paying if forward” for myself so to speak.
I clean other people’s houses for my “JOB” in life, so that I can have the honor of being a mom who’s home when her kids are. But my real job? Being a Domestic Diva – a glorified housewife. Yeah – that’s right. I am choosing to put most of my efforts into my family and to not have a career in life right now. My kids are my career. And that’s okay with me. But when someone asks me, “so what do you do?” or “where do you work,” I always cringe. Do I say I am a housewife? Do I say I am a house cleaner? Do I make it sound grand and say I “run my own company?” No matter how I say it, the reality is it isn’t sexy and glorified living, like the ones on TV.
I know my friends, I know my city. This version of reality I live is shared commonly across the street, across the isle at church, across town, and across the state. No one gets any kudos, but we hopefully get the satisfaction of knowing the efforts we put forth will pay off in rewards rich in love and the blessing of watching our children grow and our investments take root. The people I clean for? They are my mission and ministry of service to those outside my home. It is a blessing to be allowed to go into their homes, trusted and respected, and to bless them by taking care of the dirty work so they can spend more time loving on their families and less time cleaning, grocery shopping, doing laundry, and other nameless tasks. It doesn’t sound like an amazing career, I have no cool name to put on it, but it is one I am honored to do.
This is just a day in the life of reality NOT seen on TV.